Women want more sex with partners

Extra-marital affairs are OK, but premarital sex is definitely not. Sex is more welcome anytime, anywhere than ever before. But the experience between the sheets isn't as exciting or as frequent as it used to be.

These are just a few of the findings of the eighth India Today-AC Nielsen-Org Marg sex survey, which seeks to understand how the perceptions and expectations of women have changed between 2003 and 2010.

Seven years after it first probed female sexuality in 2003, the survey conclusively establishes that sex is more important to women now than it was in 2003-with 72 per cent of those surveyed asserting its place in their lives, compared with 66 per cent in 2003.

The frequency of sex, though, is not at all a flattering comment on the Indian libido. Forty-nine per cent women said they had sex between once a week and once in two months.

The percentage of those who have sex more than once a week (25 per cent), meanwhile, has dipped from 30 per cent in 2003. Conducted on 5,369 respondents (2,664 women and 2,705 men aged 18 to 60 years) across 11 cities-including Delhi, Mumbai, Chennai, Kolkata, Ludhiana, Ahmedabad and Patna-the 2010 survey establishes that women want better sex and that it's time for men to find out how inadequate they are.

Men are clearly not setting their women on fire, with sexual excitement levels among their better half plummeting. A mere 17 per cent women find their sex life thrilling, against 21 per cent in 2003. The percentage of those who are contented with their life between the sheets has also fallen from 41 per cent seven years ago to 35 per cent. Women are also fantasising less-35 per cent, against 44 per cent in 2003.

Clearly, the men have a lot to do to make their women happy. "What men do not realise is that women can also have days when they want to break something, pick their noses, eat a gigantic steak or roam around the house in a torn T- shirt," writes Kalki Koechlin on the survey findings.

Stressing the need for men to let go of their ego and need to provide, possess and protect their women, Kalki offers tips for men to get their act together.

"Sometimes romance is as simple as a man staying by our side when the whole world sits in judgment," she says. "At times, it means physically letting us leave and sort out problems." As a testament to the growing aspirations of women, three of four women say it's important to be financially independent for a healthy relationship.

It was women in Ludhiana (96 per cent) who voiced the need for financial independence the most, followed by 84 per cent in Ahmedabad and 82 per cent in Delhi.

The definition of financial security has also changed. Commenting on the survey findings, Vijay Nagaswami, psychiatrist and author of The Fifty-50 Marriage, writes: "In the past, financial insecurity for woman referred to either the insufficiency of the man's income-generating capability or his financial profligacy... Today, when financial independence is becoming the norm for women, the term has come to reflect the lack of financial transparency between partners." Couples should begin work on their relationship with the issues of financial security, he says.

Women's sexual preferences remain old-fashioned. Shaved chests are a no-no, with 26 per cent women rating a hairy chest a huge turn-on. The penis ranks next (23 per cent) as the part of the male anatomy that women find the most attractive.

The man remains perched firmly on top of his woman, with 61 per cent women preferring the missionary position (an 8 per cent increase from 2003). And it is the man who controls bedroom dynamics, as is evident from the 76 per cent who expect their women to satisfy their needs.

Only 11 per cent women reported having sex for their own pleasure. Clearly, the opposite sexes in India have a long way to go before they hit the G-spot.

Sex and our cities
Delhi: It tops the EQ index, with 91 per cent saying it's important to fulfil partner's emotional needs. Eightytwo per cent women, however, said financial independence was important

Mumbai: The city tops in rating sexual satisfaction as most important and in having had a homosexual experience ( 18 per cent). One in three respondents (men and women) had first sexual encounter in teens

Jaipur: Almost in competition with Mumbai, a quarter of those surveyed said they were ready to have sex anytime. Sex with two partners together is the fantasy of 23 per cent

Kolkata: The city is the least sexually active among the 11 surveyed: 33 per cent respondent said they had never slept with anyone. But Kolkata reported maximum love marriages

Life between the sheets
72% Women say sex is important in their lives, compared with 66 per cent in 2003

Not satisfied
48% Women are not satisfied with their life between the sheets, compared with 38 per cent in 2003
27% Women in Jaipur have had lesbian fantasies, followed by 15 per cent in Lucknow

No cheating
50% Women do not approve of the idea of sleeping outside their marriage, compared with 69 per cent in 2003 49% Women have sex infrequently - from once a week to once in two months 64% Women are opposed to premarital sex, compared with 60 per cent of men who approve it.

Biggest turn-on
26% Women say a man's chest hair is the biggest turn- on; 23 per cent say it is the penis 75% Women say their own financial independence is important for a healthy relationship

Missionary wins
61% Women are happiest having sex in the missionary position, compared with 53 per cent in 2003

The most beddable
Salman Khan
Maybe it's the thought of him taking off his shirt, showing off his rippling muscles, or just his runins with the law that makes women rate Salman Khan as the Bollywood hero they would most want to take to bed. Sallu is the most desirable of the Khan triumvirate-beating Aamir and Shah Rukh, and, of course Bollywood's latest pin-up boy Ranbir Kapoor

Katrina Kaif
The Bollywood star most men fantasise about, Katrina Kaif's fair skin clearly puts her leagues ahead of the other bombshells - Kareena Kapoor, Priyanka Chopra and Bipasha Basu, who is ranked the lowest on the desirability quotient. Sallu's ex is ranked just ahead of another one of his exes-Aishwarya Rai Bachchan-by men. Fair, clearly, is still considered lovely

SOURCE: http://indiatoday.intoday.in/site/story/women-want-more-sex-with-partners/1/119692.html